Getting ready for Pope John Paul II's Beatification and the Vatican's Bloggers' Meeting in Rome... A few notes and thoughts

Just after publishing this post I will be preparing to leave for Rome and the Vatican's Bloggers' Meeting. It's quite an exciting time for me, mainly for the reason that I will (please God) see the Eternal City for the first time. Of course, it is also an honour to be able to participate in the Vatican's first ever engagement with Catholic bloggers. I'm also looking forward to the Beatification of Pope John Paul II, to reporting on all the exciting events in Rome, and to meeting other bloggers from around the world. I also look forward to meeting many British Catholic bloggers at the planning meeting for the proposed Guild of Catholic bloggers on 7 May, after my return from Rome.

Over the past few weeks, and especially during Holy Week, I have been thinking quite a lot about my responsibilities and duties as someone who blogs as a Catholic. My main concern is that blogging - or engaging with others on the rather impersonal media found on the internet - can lead to a tragic betrayal of one's Christian vocation. During Holy Week, my main concern was that I lack love and compassion when I blog. It's easier for me to judge or condemn than to be humble and look at the massive plank in my own eye when I am staring at a computer monitor.

St Paul famously said that all our work will have been in vain if its beginning and ending is not grounded in love. We might be great prophets, or wonderful evangelists, but without love all our actions will be accounted as nothing, and less than nothing (cf 1 Cor 13). This piece of Scripture is important - for it seems to set some ground rules concerning salvation. So, wanting and needing to work out my own salvation, I must, as one who claims to love Christ, pay heed to such warnings. I must love, and my love must be real. I must love God, as one who honours His Commandments and His truth; I must love my neighbour as one whom I want to attract to God, not drive away from Him; and I must love myself, as a real person, not a character or someone so addicted to my own words that I have no time for God's Word.

It is well known that blogging tends to amplify feelings and attitudes, and provides what many would consider to be an artificial way of engaging with others. It's much easier to condemn a man, even a bishop or one who should know better, when we don't have to look him in the eye. It can also, conversely, be easier to talk about loving others whilst tapping on a keyboard at home than if we had to deal with the same people in real life. So, for me, blogging must always be kept in perspective. It is not the real world, but it does contain very worldly temptations. Anything that feeds my pride or ego cannot be good - and, sometimes, the sense of satisfaction when posting criticisms on my blog or when "going for the kill" (joining in that journalistic mentality that sees men merely as stories, not persons loved by God) does lead to an over-abundance of pride and self-will. Blogging can be dangerous, even if it's something I feel presently called to do.

So, I really think that bloggers - those of us who travel through uncharted waters and who face demons who are more than ready to see Christians fight amongst themselves in public - really need to be spiritually healthy. For that to happen, we need the support of others, especially those who know what it's like to blog. No Christian is an island, we cannot be followers of Christ without being deeply united to all his other followers. We need other (flesh and blood) human beings, to share our pilgrimages with. We need the Church, and should never think ourselves above that need. We also need the mutual support of others, especially those who tread similar paths to our own. This, more than any other, is the reason behind wanting to set up a guild (or group) for Catholic bloggers.

Blogging in the name of the Church or as Catholics - all with our own opinions and ways of approaching the faith - can, of course, be immensely beneficial to those of us who blog, to the Christian community and to the world at large. It can lead to the salvation of souls and to a valid contribution to the mission of the Church. I have also often heard from people who are amazed at what they can learn from reading Christian blogs. Catholic blogs can be instruments of the Holy Spirit, too - who uses them to call the Church to renewal and reform. At the present time, some very brave men and women use their blogs to call some of our bishops and leaders to account, especially when their actions seem to undermine or weaken the Church's tradition, truth or unity. But, in order to be effective, bloggers must be like Christ in all things - shouting and being rude are usually things which run contrary to the way Our Lord would have us behave. Being patient, kind and always willing to be abused by the powerful are signs of Christ's presence in us. He always humbles the proud and raises up those who are lowly.

I honestly believe that a Guild of Catholic Bloggers would help those of us who blog grow closer to each other in love. We would be able to meet face to face, in the real world, and get to know one another as Christians should. We could care for each others' needs, physical and spiritual, and pray together in unity and peace. It might be possible to use Guild meetings to seek reconciliation and forgiveness - for, in the heat of online arguments, it can be too easy to fall out or say things that are designed to hurt. A Guild of Catholic Bloggers could also arrange for spiritual retreats and conferences, or workshops designed to get the most out of blogging. It could also facilitate talks by experienced and holy bloggers, who would be able to guide those who wish to turn their blogs into tools of the new evangelisation or aids to holiness.

Blogging can really enthuse the Church with new life, it can challenge authority in a good way, it can provide a voice for real prophets, and it is also a way in which Christians can help each other grow in holiness. Of course, the opposite is sometimes true - a blogger who has become too reliant on the self and entered into a delusional space, can be a danger to the Church and a stumbling block to those who seek Christ. For that reason, I honestly believe that a blogger who feels that he or she is above the Church or is able to survive alone has really lost his or her way. Like a soul that has entered into the world of the ego and been led away by the sin of pride, a blogger who isolates him or herself or who seems Pharisaical in their treatment of Christ's Bride and the Church's ministers is in danger of falling away from grace.

I have become acutely aware of the dangers of blogging since I began writing as A Reluctant Sinner, and for that reason feel a need to experience help from others, especially those who understand the blogger's "vocation". As much as I enjoy writing and finding stories, sharing my opinions or making virtual friends, I would much rather meet with people in the flesh. I also wish I could sometimes attend Masses specifically geared towards those who blog as Catholics - if only to pray with them, to worship God with them, and to listen to a homily that might speak to me as a Catholic blogger. It is for all these reasons that I think a Guild of Catholic Bloggers is necessary. It is also for this reason that I think the Holy Spirit is prompting our pastors and leaders to engage with the sometimes frightening world of the blogosphere!